Small Penis Contest Actually Exists

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Calling all you lil ones out there! A competition based in Denmark is offering a new iPhone to the contestant with, you guessed, the smallest penis. Fear not second and third places, you get an iPad! The contest is sponsored by a website called singlesex.dk, which is owned by a man named Morton Fabricius, who described the affair as “weird and funny and almost too much.” Eh…but is it… too much?

Contestants are urged to send in photos of their erect penis next to a measuring tape. A half dozen entries have already been sent in. As much as the competition has a clear comedic side, Fabricius also believe that it will have a different social effect, showing other men that they are not alone in a culture which assures us that bigger is in fact better. “Everything has to be bigger, and bigger, and bigger…its incredible how the media has frightened people from showing themselves as they are,” told Fabricius to The Australian.

Sex experts are also touting the contest as a positive influence, noting that the average penis is 5.5 inches long, and that there are a lot of different..er…shapes and sizes out there. Feel free to submit yours until the competition ends on January 31st.